Thursday, March 31, 2011

patient #0017983

Facility archive records search – searching…
Complete – found 19 results for search terms “patient #0017983″
Chronological listings follow:
1. ) admission form, patient #0017983 – 11/18/05 15:12
Involuntary admission requested by patient’s relatives in response to apparent self-destructive conduct cycle. Self-damage apparent in physical exam: signs of past abrasions on head and neck, apparently because of self-inflicted scratching, and both fresh and partially-closed surface lacerations on arms and legs. Signs of ultimate fatigue as well apparent – in examination patient admitted insomnia for, as quoted, “longer than you’d believe. ” patient unable to give exact time for length of insomnia, likely because of extended amount of time of insomnia itself. Confusion and moderate delerium apparent. Preliminary medication issued: triazolam 0. 25mg for insomnia, topical bacitracin for wound care.

2. ) admission evaluation, patient #0017983 – 11/18/05 16:56
Performed by: dr. Emil lafayette. Self-damage confirmed. Patient got rid of dressings from arm lacerations, reopened wound while waiting for interviewer. Definite evidence of somniphobia in patient justifications for damage; patient refers to sleep with anxiety, and consistently acts versus self to cause pain in response to lengthy periods of silence or other lack of stimuli. Issue of insomnia needs immediate attention, given evidence of extremely prolonged duration. Similarly possible agoraphobia. Patient requests an aside bed, becomes withdrawn/agitated when request is refused, refuses to cooperate farther with consultation. Offers vague suggestion of hostile “other” in justification, but will not detailed, as quoted, “because you’re not going to believe she exists until she hurts somebody anyway. ” evidence for likely paranoid schizophrenia. Recommend farther consultation with full psychological spectrum testing for exact diagnosis. Final recommendation: admit patient. Preliminary medication issued: cancel triazolam, rather 5mg diazepam twice each day for insomnia, anxiety, and probable sleep disorders.

3. ) final admission report, patient #0017983 – 11/18/05 17:13
Patient issued bed in room 409. Current occupant(s): patient #0017802, patient #0017983. Clothes from admission remanded to family of patient, three sets of common dress issued for immediate needs. Farther psych eval scheduled for 10:00 11/19/05, determining future length of remain.

4. ) ward event report – 11/18/05 17:30
During mundane new patient room check, patient #0017802 places request with staff for transfer to, as quoted, “some other room. ” appears agitated, claims patient #0017983 has been disturbing him. Patient #0017983 similarly requests transfer, to aside bed. Both requests refused. Orderly note: followup room check suggested to avoid possible intrapatient conflict.

5. ) ward event report – 11/18/05 19:00
Followup room check. Patient #0017983 claims dr. Lafayette has ordered him moved to isolation. Patient #0017802 backs claim. Administration records demonstrate no such order. Upon informing room occupants, patient #0017983 attempts to assault staff and patient #0017802 becomes uncontrolled agitated. Additional personnel expected to comprise incident. Both people who are in need of medical care restrained, sedated, forced into early lights out. Orderly note: exercise caution in all future room checks for 409.

6. ) ward event report – 11/18/05 23:57
Staff on hall 1, floor 4 report loud sounds from room 409 after facility lights out, disturbing other rooms and people who are in need of medical care. Patient #0017983 found awake, extremely agitated and struggling versus restraints. Demands lights be turned back on, as quoted, “before she comes. ” self-sustained injuries to wrists and ankles at points of restraint. Patient efforts to struggle versus staff during trade to more comprehensive restraint, calling for additional personnel to comprise incident. Additional sedation required for patient #0017983. Patient #0017802 doesn’t respond during course of event, likely because of sedation from earlier incident. Orderly note: maintain restraints on patient #0017983 until farther observe. Sedate patient before removing restraints for any reason. Recommend anti-psychotic be considered in future psych eval.

7. ) ward event report – 11/19/05 00:20
Staff on hall 1, floor 4 again report loud sounds from room 409. Patient #0017983 found catatonic on floor, with serious self-inflicted scratches on head and neck. Restraints are severed at connection points, with serious bruising on limbs perchance indicating more serious injury at restraint points with patient. Patient #0017802 is found deceased. Serious disfiguring wounds to face, complete with destruction (orderly note: ingestion? ) of patient’s eyes. Moved to room 101, locker 2, awaiting autopsy. Patient #0017983 transfered to isolation, room 626, given injected dose of 100mg zuclopenthixol on attending physician’s orders to manipulate acute psychosis. Orderly note: recommend video observation to grant better control of future outbursts. Remain leastwise an arm’s length away from patient upper body restraints always. Just in case.

8. ) autopsy report, patient #0017802 – 11/19/05 09:44
Performed by: dr. Julius tweed. Ragged lacerations prominent around subject’s head and neck, incrementing in severity and depth on the regions of the face itself – at assorted points, the flesh is cut to the bone. More disconcertingly, subject’s eyes seem to be violently got rid of from their sockets and are missing. Cause of death: exsanguination from wounds. Final judgement: homicide. Coroner note: recommend thoughtfulness of patient #0017983 as dangerous to staff and facility residents. Urge continued maintenance of restraints and isolation from contact with others in patient population. As well recommend digestive endoscopy to determine destiny of missing tissues for staff cohesion purposes – orderlies from floor 4 suspect cannibalism, promise to refuse isolation shifts until such faith is disproven.

9. ) medical report, patient #0017983 – 11/19/05 10:07
Performed by: dr. Antoinus cayle. Patient is cooperative, if withdrawn, during examination. No outbursts or threats. Current drug regimen appears effective. No strange tissue or objects came across in digestive endoscopy. Radiology tests discover hairline fractures in tibia, fibula of right leg. Serious abrasions apparent on skin of restraint points, as well head and neck, calling for topical treatment. Troubling instability in vitals – bp is acutely elevated, pulse rapid and weak for patient’s size. Extended stress from anxiety, elevated mood, and insomnia likely cause. Physician note: patient will have to sleep to begin recovery routine. Recommend elevated dosage of diazepam to give hope or courage to this result. Firm contact-point restraints not commended for this patient due to attempt a campaign without regard to possible loss or injury of farther injury. Full-body restraint will have to be considered as alternative.

10. ) psychiatric evaluation, patient #0017983 – 11/19/05 10:39
Performed by: dr. George tulling. Definite evidence indicating disassociation of identity from activities. Patient expresses remorse for death of patient #0017802, yet refuses to admit obligation for activities in said event. Rather externalizes blame into antagonistic female “other. ” same figure, apparently referenced in prior evaluation, seems to be central actor in patient’s paranoid psychosis. Conduct and activities of said “other” justified through magical thinking, despite recognition of depicted individual’s illogically-defined capablenesses to sustain reported antagonism. As quoted, “i don’t acknowledge, you don’t acknowledge, and she doesn’t care. ” patient requests observation of room be terminated, grows agitated when request is refused, makes threats, refuses to proceed consultation. Diagnosis: paranoid schizophrenia manifesting in somniphobia, violent psychosis, and disassociative episodes. Medication issued: up dosage for diazepam to 10mg twice each day, on 11/24/05 start out issuing 2. 5mg doses of haloperidol twice each day for psychosis. Interviewer note: apply patient observation protocols and ward rounds to check for possible drug fundamental interaction effects, followup without delay if found or on 11/30/05 otherwise.

11. ) ward event report – 11/19/05 14:32
During general rounds patient #0017983 requests that observation of room be terminated. Warns staff of sensed threat inherently in observation protocol. When request is refused, begins struggling versus restraints and screaming warnings to staff, observation camera operator with regards to disassociative, antagonistic “other. ” acting physician note: reject recommendations from orderlies to sedate patient #0017983 unless medically or procedurally sound. Sedatives are not a safety blanket. Orderly note: they say this guy is at his sedative limit, and he was closely pulling his bed off its bolts. Use double staff if at all possible when transaction with him. Whatever’s in his head… it’s strong.

12. ) staff communications – 11/19/05 16:53
From: charles mckinney – head of patient care department
To: patient care staff list
Subject: re:fwd:patient #0017983
This has officially gone far sufficient. I didn’t intervene in this matter before, because i was underneath the impression that the men and women underneath my supervision were beyond such things as this, but circumstances have proven me to be mistaken and i will not grant these rumors to progression any farther. The only thing “wrong” with patient #0017983 is that he is badly ill and contingent upon us for care and assistance in his recovery. He is not the firstborn patient with explosive episodes we have treated, he is not even the only one presently in our facility, and he will not be the last. It thence pains me to discover that one singular breach of safety, which was in the proper manner addressed by facility protocol, has left my staff whispering superstitions to one another and accepting the delusions of our patient as truth. We are better than this. There are in truth risks inherently in this profession, risks we all knew with regards to upon assuming it, but that is the burden we bear to render aid to those who find themselves in our beds.
Until otherwise noted i will not approve of any shift changes from scheduled isolation hours. Our staff counselors are always available during general hours for those who must consult with somebody in light of the recent event and related workplace anxiety. It is a fringe gain of working in mental health, and i suggest anyone having troubles apply of it. This matter is closed, and i want to listen no farther mention of it. As previously stated, i expected more from all of you.
– charles

13. ) ward event report – 11/19/05 20:44
During general rounds patient #0017983 requests that lights be left on after scheduled lights out time. After consultation with attending physician and therapist, request granted. Room check proceeds uneventfully until staff move to depart, at which point request is made for observation to be terminated. Upon denial of request, patient rather requests for lights to be doused as general. Request granted. Another request is made, now for red-bulb sleep lights to be doused during scheduled lights out time. Patient grasps that low-level light is necessary for room observation – as quoted, “that’s why i want them off. ” warns observation camera operator versus her. Attending therapist denies request. Sorry jacob…

14. ) staff communications – 11/19/05 21:12
From: dr. Emil lafayette
To: patient care staff list
Subject: lights in 626
I happened to observe tonight while in final checks that the sleep lights in isolation 626 were turned off after general rounds – without my noesis, or assent. As i am certain you’re all conscious, this is a serious breach of facility protocol. When video observation of a patient is commended and approved, there’s one of the reasons for such a decision to be made. Patient #0017983 has violent episodes and will have to be monitored to denigrate the risk of him causing farther damage to his already precarious physical state. You have absolutely no authority to override conclusions made by the medical personnel of this, or any other, facility. None.
I have been hearing talk around the halls that numerous of you’re affrighted of this man. He is bound to a bed, underneath the most eminent sedation we can medically provide, and both physically and mentally suffering from acute fatigue. Do you as well jump at shadows? No matter of the reason, i will not permit without training orderlies to begin intervening in the care provided to our people who are in need of medical care. If such an event occurs again, i will inform mr. Mckinney and see the entire night’s orderly staff barred from the premises. Do i make myself clear?
– dr. Emil lafayette md, facep, mhsc

15. ) ward event report – 11/19/05 23:27
[patient #0017983, name redacted] won’t stop screaming. It just won’t stop. Hours of it. It echoes in my ears, in my skull. Whenever he’s coherent he begs us to turn the camera off, or the lights off, or just make everything go away. I’m sorely tempted, poor [software censored], but doc lafayette pulled jacob from observation and is looking at everybody from the video room for the rest of his shift thanks to michael’s business with the lights earlier. Last i saw of him, he was headed for the elevator with his jacket saying he “just can’t do this to my kids. ” i don’t acknowledge why i’m here anymore. I just keep staring up at the cameras. Is that [software censored] busier looking at his patient, or us?
I’d only need one needle to come to a halt the screaming…
16. ) ward event report – 11/20/05 00:01
It stopped. Just… stopped. No one’s willing to check why. I think [patient #0017983, name redacted] is gone. I pray she is gone.

17. ) staff communications – 11/20/05 00:04
From: dr. Emil lafayette
To: all
Subject: patient #0017983 again
I said no one is to enter isolation 626 without my express permission, god [software censored] you all! I will have all your jobs forohgod
I will be good mommy
Please not the belt please
He is dead i am dead she is dead we are dead and
We. All. Fall. Down.

18. ) admission evaluation, patient #0017986 – 11/20/05 9:25
Performed by: dr. George tulling. Previous staff. Patient came across in locked observation room setting fire to instrumentation and recordings. Attempted suicide in flames before rescue by staff. Claims to be antagonized by same female “other” as previous patient #0017983. Perchance involved in death of said resident. If so, evidence apparent for disassociation of self from activities. Likely paranoid schizophrenia. Patient will not respond to farther questions – as quoted, “don’t go on the lookout for her. She’ll find you. ” final recommendation: admit patient. Preliminary medication issued: 2. 5mg doses of haloperidol twice each day for schizophrenic psychosis.

19. ) staff communications – 11/20/05 9:36
From: dr. George tulling
To: charles mckinney – head of patient care department
Subject: i’ve just heard.
Seal him in isolation, wait her out, cremate both bodies. As far as the relatives are concerned, patient #0017983 passed away in the fire set by lafayette in consecrating suicide. That’s all anyone needs to acknowledge.
Let’s just hope the rest of us don’t wind up calling for time in these beds as well.

In Between

I’m in between.

One of them bit me. The bastard took a chunk out of my upper arm. The fool probably didn’t even acknowledge it was an arm. He probably saw me as a walking turkey leg or something. Oh, but he got his dues. I whacked his useless head off with a crowbar i stole when shit got serious.

It got serious regarding a month ago, and let me tell you, it took place just the way every one thought it would take place. A little “contained” outbreak, then boom, every one i acknowledge is staggering around like kangaroos tripping on dextro. Not me, altho. I knew i was going to fight it. I did well until regarding a week ago when mr. Slobbermouth munched on my bicep.

It amazes even me that i’m so coherent. God, i wish i wasn’t. I’m not like them, but i’m exactly like them. I’ve the hunger they have, but i have all the guilt feelings and love of humanity that is going to keep me from surviving.

I’m not even sure that i want to outlast anymore. I see them do horrible things, things that are starting to drive me mad, and i either get sick to my stomach or find my mouth watering. I don’t want to live whether or not living means i’ve to watch the destruction of my kind every day.
But then, this means no more hiding. It’s as whether or not they can sense something in me, like they scan for a zombie membership card and find it on me. They leave me alone. I can walk freely amid them.

You know how i said i’m exactly like them? Well, i’m better than them. I’m smarter and have the ability to gain the trust of people . I found one yesterday, i acknowledge where all the good hiding spots are, you see, and lord was it happy to see me. It grasped my arm and looked into my eyes, saying it was happy to have found an individual to fight with. Making sure none of the no-brains were around, i took it with me and hid with it in a storm cellar. I let it fall asleep, then i broke its neck, busted open its head like a coconut, and tore into its meaty brain. The blood complimented it nicely.
For a couple of moments, i felt bad for what i had done. I saw his body in that stagnant pool of blood, looking as whether or not he was still sleeping, and felt a heap of remorse for the poor, trusting boy. I wondered regarding his life before the tragedy. Was he happy? Did his family love him? Would he have pulled through anyway?
That acidic guilt feelings rose in me, a never-ending reminder of my humanity. But there’s leastwise one thing zombies and persons have in mutual: the will to outlast. And i’m about to do a much better job than either one of them will.

Monday, March 28, 2011

In the Walls

Last year, i moved into a middle class house right around summer time. The move went smooth, and it seemed like everything was just…working. Not one thing broke for the duration of the cycle, i had plenty of friends to assist me out, hell i even found twenty bucks in my couch! Beer cash? Hell yeah!
Anyway, back to the house. For the introductory day or two, i thought life couldn’t get any better; my girl was wholesome and beautiful, my friends were happy, and my parents were fixing their relationship. Nevertheless, i hadn’t realized – until it was too late – that i was doomed to remain in this prison, which i sit in now as i tell you this story.
The introductory time it happened, i was in my room. I was in the zone on my xbox. You recognise what i mean, where you get 10 headshots without breaking a sweat? Yeah, that. As i was kicking fat terrorist ass i heard motion downstairs (my room was on the second floor). It sounded like somebody was running around down there. Like, they were running from room to room banging on the walls, just being flat out obnoxious.
“hey, jeff! Get out of my house, i said three-o’clock, dumbass! ”
The noise stopped.
I waited a couple of moments before turning back to my game, but it was too late. I was already doomed. I saw it come at me too late…a tank.
“son of a…” i sighed.
The following few days were normal, there were no more sounds that shouldn’t be there, just the pipes, the heater, you recognise the sort. Yet, in regards to 3 days later, that moron jeff snuck into my house and started beating up my shit.
“alright, you aren’t getting off so easy this time! ” i shouted as i charged down the stairs. As my foot hit the last step, something out of the corner of my eye moved. I looked over so fast that i got whiplash. “oh, dammit! ” i moaned. I didn’t even compensate any attention to the fact that whatever was in my house – had disappeared.
After that, it got worse.
That same night, as i layed in bed, the banging started again. Not only was it worse, but it was on my floor of the house this time. I was certain i locked everything before i came up here, so here i was pissing my pants at 900 miles per hour while something despoiled and destroyed my house. I actually pulled the blankets over me – hey, i was frighted – as the noise neared my door. Exactly as i expected it to bash open my door and slaughter me, it stopped.
The following morning i grabbed my baseball bat as i got out of bed, whether or not whatever that thing is, was hushed and still out there, it would regret it. I didn’t find anything, but my house was trashed. Nearly everything was tipped over, torn, broken, missing, or worse. I just figured i had been robbed.
I called the police, they didn’t do shit. But the noises stopped for a week or so, and that made things posing no difficulty. Certain i was pissed that some fuck despoiled and destroyed my new place, but leastwise i was ok. But, naturally, i recognise now that it wasn’t a robber, or jeff, or the pipes in the walls…it was the thing in the walls.
A week after the incident, it came back.
This time it was pissed. I was startled out of my slumber by the noise of a vase breaking into a thousand pieces downstairs. Smash it went, with little pieces hushed and still breaking a couple of seconds after the introductory smash as whether or not to mock me.
Not long after, i started to listen more spacious and deep, guttural banging noises on the walls again. Coming from inside of them, no confession and doubt. As i lie there in my bed, i let out the tiniest, quietest, timidest squeak by absolute fault, and the noise stops.
Sharpest ears i’ve ever seen, those were.
After various painstakingly long moments of repress and silence, i freed the breath i was holding, thinking it was over for now. Big fault, i realize, as the noises all of a sudden begin to rampage up the stairs. Incredibly fast, incredibly piercing, smack, crash, bang versus my wooden floor.
The beast, which i could now accurately call it, broke my door open with intense strength, thrusting it all the way to the opposite side of the room. Being an enterprising and intellectual individual, i had already occult and concealed underneath my impenetrable field of shelter and safety known as the mutual blanket.
The noise of this monster running through my room, it’s footsteps enough to harm my eardrums at this close, was the scariest thing i had ever competent and experienced in my entire life.
With a sudden burst of adrenaline, i threw the blankets off in the direction of the…thing, in some way making a direct impact to its face. Whoever – or whatever – this was, was stunned. But not for long, and i knew that. I frantically moved across my room, attempting to make it out the door, downstairs, outside, where i could attract public attention.
This night, luck wasn’t on my side. I knew this as a prominent hunk of my hair was grabbed from behind and pulled out with such strength that pieces of skins came along with it, along with a shitload of blood. Before a scream escapes my voice box, i’m being retained down by a dark, hairless beast that walks on all fours with a face i can scarcely imagine again, that then smashes my head with it’s fist, sending me into a dark, welcoming sleep.

Somebody new has moved in, but they don’t even recognise my existence, the jackass. I regularly and patiently watch, wait, listen, hoping that they will. But no. Not me. I’m not worth it to them.
Perhaps whether or not i bang on the walls.

Rocky Transition

I was sitting in the upstairs office of the museum with a cup of coffee when it happened. It had been a long day, and i’d set the work experience kid the seemingly unfuckupable task of dusting the exhibits- after repeating my warning, of course, that a good deal of of them shouldn’t be touched or opened. A terrified scream, rapidly strangled by a building-shaking thump and an astounding rending sound, brought me rushing downstairs.
The mirror room- i knew it. In there, there hung an ancient mirror, with regards to a foot around, made of polished obsidian. Behind the glass walls of its parade and display case, it was harmless- even though persons amusingly reported seeing the face of an evil hag in it sometimes. Watching it unprotected was fury and madness, even though- surely for those without my noesis of the old ways.
I arrived in the mirror room, and a horrid smell hung in the air. On the floor lay half a body- the lower half, hushed and still in the clothes i recognised from earlier. The skin had been stretched purple and torn away, and the organs inside that hadn’t been torn free leaked their contents onto the floor. The legs were at the bottom of a maroon spray that started below the wooden case of the mirror, and the hipbone lay almost versus the wall.
The case was broken- the wooden sides pushed outwards. Clumps of hair, matted with skin and blood, stuck to the frame of the mirror. Concentrating now, i stepped in front of the black disc, my sandals cautiously placed either side of the bile-sprayed limbs and pool of blood on the floor. Looking into the dark reflection of the room, i saw my double once more. In her hand was a haggard and pale arm that led down to a broken form, and a trail of darkness. Sure enough, when she lifted the half-corpse into the air, i recognised the shattered and stretched face.

Failed Rituals

I genuinely wish i had left that fucking light switch alone. Who would have thought the flick of a switch could mean the difference amidst life and death. Genuinely everyone’s thought that. That’s why i turned it on. Sordid and stupid small rituals that we take from childhood. The light will chase the monsters away, the blanket over your head will save you from the boogie man. And you just get more of these rituals as you get older. As long as you lock the doors and turn on the home ease and security institution and system, you can rest your head happily in your cozy small fortified home. No killers or psychos, monsters or boogie men.
But it doesn’t work. None of it. We at all times slip up a heap of how. The one time you forget to lock that door. That’s when they get you. I would have been sound asleep whether or not i hadn’t been woken by the loud slam as the front door blew open. I stumbled out of bed and down the hall to see it swinging back and forth. I moved quickly down the hall to secure it. A moment of panic swelled inside of me. My home felt like a crime scene. It wasn’t my safe small sanctum anymore.
Despite the overpowering feeling of intrusion, there was no sign of disruption. Just the door. Just my unthinking and careless fault. I couldn’t apprehend it at introductory. It had to be a burgler or a heap of psycho. I looked around the rest of the house. Checking each cupboard, each crevice. Nothing. I felt sordid and stupid but relieved. I just wanted to get back to bed, to forget this whole embarrassment. I flung myself back down on my bed, closed my eyes for just a second. I sat back up. There was no way i’d fall asleep unless i double-checked that i locked the door this time. I mean i was sure i had done it this time but i felt this was justified paranoia.
I got to the door and tortuous and twisted the handle roughly about a dozen times, each time feeling the resistance of the lock. I smiled. Safe. I turned on my heels to go back to bed. But it was just a glimpse, a flare and flicker of something in my peripheral resourcefulness that sent me swinging back into a panic. A shadow from the kitchen. I rushed in merely to be confronted by my normal kitchen, bathed in moonlight. I sighed, questioned my sanity and decided that this, the longest night of my life must end. I went towards the bedroom once more. Another odd shadow crossed my path. As a shiver travelled down my spine, my tired mind braced apathetic denial and decided that it was in all likelihood the neighbours cat passing by the moonlit window.
I sat wide awake in my bed. Trying to tranquilize myself to sleep. Counting in my head until i might at long last nod off. But everytime i closed my eyes that feeling of intrusion was hushed and still there. The hands of something unseen looming above my head. Each creak and each shadow filled my mind with the dread of my childhood. Those nights after being tucked in by my parents. Those same trembling and fearful thoughts of lurking pathos and terror. But it was nothing… right? More creaks. More motion in the shadows. I turned and pushed my face into the pillow. I felt something brush passed my foot which stuck awkwardly out from below my blanket.
I jolted upright, looking deeply into the darkness. Swirling shadows. The monsters. The boogie men. I felt around sheepishly for my phone. The wearisome and dull light of the screen could put me at ease. Nothing on the nightstand and when my fingers roamed around the edge of the bed, instinctively i retracted them for fear of the unknown. I was alone but in the shadows i saw them, the monsters. Inky atrocious and abominable beasts.
It was the sole thing i thought could assist me. I lunged from the bed directly at the switch. My palm slammed down on it and the room erupted into light. My eyes burned momentarily and i glanced round the room. Frivolous and empty. Safe. Just paranoia. I shook my head and hit the switch once more. Climbing into bed in the pitch black. No shadows without my nightvision. But now i listen them. I can’t see them now. I don’t recognise what they want but i recognise i can’t leave. The rituals have failed. They’re on the other side of this blanket and all i can do now is hope that they’re gone in the morning.

A little far out there

Hey! My name's Blake Smith and I've been writing short and out there stories over the years. People have always been urging me to get these stories out there, so to speak, and here I am. I'll gradually be posting stories in my free time so be sure to check back often.

Hope you like it ;)